Unintentional Hiatus

It’s been a minute since I’ve done anything on here. That is due to complete laziness. Many times I’ve had those “I should blog about this” moments”, but nothing came of them. I guess it’s a lack of inspiration. Maybe I’ve been too busy, work and school have consumed a lot of my life. Work especially. Warning: Long post.

1. I’ve been in this house too damn long, but it’s OK. The routine is getting to me, but I’ve added a few activities to remedy that. We need cameras here, there is so much hilarity that goes on. I have been told that I should vlog about it, but I/we ain’t ready for that lol

2. Plenty of things have been going on, but I’ve been hesitant to put them in words. Writing forces you to think about events in much more detail and you may realize things that you did not realize before. Back in the day my parents used to make me write about my day when I came home and I’d write about all this stuff I did during the day and I hated it because I knew what I did why did they need to know, so nosy. Foreshadowing.

3. I feel like I’m slowly starting to live my life now. Maybe it’s because I’m becoming older and priorities have shifted. I’m starting to place a heavier emphasis on certain aspects of life that I did not knew existed before.

4. I might be a workaholic. I say this because I have been putting in a lot of hours at work, but they never feel like a lot of hours because I enjoy what I do. I’m hesitant to say that I love my job because I don’t want to feel like I’ve..peaked too early? Aren’t people supposed to go through years of jobs they don’t like before they’re content? Work isn’t “work”, it’s just another part of my life, at least that’s how I feel right now. The only downside is having to wake up early as shii. I’m not a morning person, I never will be.

I am working to live, not living for work, which is what is what matters to me.

5. What I call “commitment” issues can 90% of the time be attributed to laziness. I told myself I was going how to code this year, through some free website. I barely made it a month before I gave up. Same thing with working out, some days the motivation is there, most days it isn’t. I have a problem applying myself…but that’s a work in progress.

6. I’ve come to value my family more than I used to. Staying at home for my whole life basically, has lead to me some interesting observations into my family dynamic. One thing that has especially changed is the level of openness with my parents. Before I always used to lie about where I was, who I was with, etc. This was mainly due to the fact my parents were very overprotective and always wanted to me focus on education. Slowly that started to change and I’m at a point where I can openly talk with them about most things.

7. There’s been a series of unfortunate events that have occurred this year. But at the same time there has been an equal amount of good fortune as well. That’s that karma, it’s always going to balance out. Speaking of karma…

8. Fate. I may have already talked about this topic, but it seems to always come up. I believe that no one is bound to their  destiny. You are not destined to do anything. You choose what you want to do and you have control over what you can do.

My view on fate is that you write your own destiny, yes things happen for a reason and there are many things that are out of your control but I believe that if you work hard enough and live your life to the fullest then you are capable of choosing your own path. There are many instances where I’ve heard something along the lines of “it was written..it was meant to happen..”.

…Or Nah

Who says that I was destined to have a certain type of future, certain type of relationship. If something happens, it happens. Shit happens, it’s how you deal with it that defines you as a person and sets the tone for your life. There doesn’t always have to be a “reason” for something to happen. Good or bad, it just happened. You can only control what you can control, you can’t worry about what is out of your control.

I’m not saying my philosophy is free of any flaws, but that’s just what I feel.

9. I need some more hobbies. (Which is partially why I’m trying to get back into blogging regularly.) Right now it is a very short list: ball, rare gaming, reading (?). That’s all I have time for these days. Or so I say, I’m hella unorganized. Sometimes I feel I live in a very chaotic state, but then I have no intention of attempting to correct this. I started to try today by cleaning my room. Baby steps.

10. Ball is life. Ball over everything.

J-Will aka White Chocolate.



2 thoughts on “Unintentional Hiatus

  1. How you gon’ sensor yourself and then not later on in the post? And that’s all I wanted to comment on.

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