Love and Marriage

Al Bundy was is the man.

This is one of my favorite shows of all time. I’m pretty sure it was not an age-appropriate show to watch at the time but I did and I’m glad I did. Kelly Bundy was THE first dimepiece for me (no the pink power ranger wasn’t that great, don’t sice it). But I digress, I only brought up this show because of the Frank Sinatra theme song.

You speak the truth bruh. There has been many talks about these ideals in my household and even amongst my friends and I wanted to expand on these thoughts.

Love is the 4 letter word that I use to describe my relationship with food, sports, and video games, but others use to describe their human relationships. I’m not there yet, but I’ll get there. Marriage..ah marriage. A lot of people I know are getting married around me, I pull up Facebook and there’s like 5 wedding albums every other week. Only reason I’d get married now is for the somewhat reduced taxes, taxes are REAL and they hurt my paycheck.

I’m not in that marriage mindset yet, I’m still tryna get my hustle right. It’s like building a tree house with no tree naimsayin?

Once I have established that part of my life I can entertain the thoughts of marriage. Now my parents have a different plan. I have met some requirements unbeknownst to me that qualifies me for marriage. Which brings me to the essence of this post..arranged marriage. why.

I thought it didn’t exist anymore, but it is definitely alive and well. My parents are very traditional in some senses, marriage being one of them. They joke with me and say “now we have to find you a nice girl from India”.

No.

My parents got an arranged marriage and they seem happy enough right now lol but I don’t think I could do it. You’re basically married to a stranger and then you have to…learn to love them? What if I can’t? What if she can’t? I see too many negative aspects to this whole idea. Their justification was that it’s better to find a girl that has a good family, good genes (!), all dat. They are concerned about the future (kids more specifically) and how things can turn out if it is just random. But I mean aren’t those the risks you take in life? Love is a risk, you don’t know how it’ll end up but that’s why pursue it. The whole idea of arranged marriage seems so formulaic and scientific to me. Now I don’t know the first steps of that whole process. But I remember the first time I saw any reference to it was in a Indian movie we were watching one day. So I’m going to sum it up with my ignorant eyes.

1. The males family had a scout. This scout looked like a family friend, who basically came back with an envelope of pictures of chicks (their faces, y’all dirty). Actually it’s like a Lil B girl time lol

2. He got these faces from families who felt they were ready to give their daughter away, I’m gonna assume they checked their background, horoscope, all that ish.

3. Male opened the envelope and just dumped on the table and began to search (the prettiest girl just happened to drop out at the very end..cue dance scene, because he saved her from some goons earlier so of course he loves her/wants to marry her now cuz that makes sense. gtfo)

4. Male picks that girl and the parents go to the girls parents to try and get a contract like Kobe’s. Jk. They basically ask for the girls hand in marriage and the girl comes out and serves everyone tea actin all giggly and ish.

5. Then a series of events challenge this marriage for about 2 hours before the bad guy dies and they finally get married.

BONUS Throwback: Simpson’s episode Apu gets the lotus flower during the peak of his bachelorhood indicating it’s time to marry some girl that his parents decided he would marry when they were infants.

Confused? Me too. According to all those prehistorical customs it sounds awful. I’m sure it’s changed now, like you probably meet the family, date the girl a lil bit and then decide if you want to spend the rest of your life with her. To me it doesn’t really matter how far that whole process has come I think I’m gonna need a little more than a few weeks to make that decision. And I don’t really understand the concept of arranged marriage, yeah you’re married but you don’t really love each other. Isn’t love supposed to come first?

End of rant.

 

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